Back on Waterloo Station where I am due to meet my friend Caramel. This time the tube was not so smooth, I went up to Archway in good time to find it was the dreaded rail replacement bus as far as Camden. Still I made it in time to get my ticket from a machine (having abandoned the huge queue in the ticket office) but no Caramel. There are however a lot of people dressed as jungle animals and hunters - people dressed as lions and as crocodiles, people wearing pith helmets, and a whole bunch of apparantly unrelated people dressed up in stuff that is nothing to do with safari's.
View Godalming to Liphook in a larger map
But no Caramel. Eventually it occurs to me to check the mobile and see there are several messages. Her tube has got stuck because of a signal failure. I buy her ticket and a bit later she arrives. We have missed the target train but there is another along shortly afterwards. Caramel has interrogated some of the animal costume people and apparently it is something to do with rugby.
We have an uneventful run to Godalming where we go first into town so I can buy a better map. WH Smith's in railway stations no longer seem to carry OS maps - but the big one in Godalming has the right one.
mausoleum but little else of especial interest.
then turns into a dirt track as it skirts Mousehill Down
Christmas tree plantation. Caramel says her kids would love it. Around here Simon her husband (who is looking after the kids) calls her on her super-smart-phone to ask for important information about cous-cous measurements.
At the entrance to Bagmoor Common is a sign warning that areas have been fenced off for grazing. And we
Inside the grazing area it is more heathy with a lot of gorse in flower.
And then we hit a metaled track that runs dead straight. I am grateful for the map because there are a bewildering number of tracks and paths around.
And it is a landscape like no other I am familiar with. Very open with wide vistas, mostly heather or sphagnum moss in the wetter parts, with the odd scots pine or patch of downy birch or gorse
http://www.naturalengland.org.uk/ourwork/conservation/designations/nnr/1006148.aspx
We puzzle over which way to go at a crossroads of paths in the Heath. Caramel offers to find out where we are from the sat nav in her phone and I have to explain to her that his is cheating and it is far better to wander about lost peering myopically at my map (because I cannot be arsed to find my glasses). These young people and their strange notions!
Eventually we compromise and I let her look at the map which she can actually see, having glasses on.
A bunch of kids walk by. We saw them as we left Milford but they had a teacher with them then and he has disappeared. We wonder what has happened to him, coming to the conclusion that the most likely explanation is that they have killed an eaten him en route. So we hide behind a tree until they are safely past.
In contrast to the open bog there are a lot of people in the very sandy, hilly country we are now in: older people walking dogs, cannibal Duke of Edinburgh award kids, etc. The going is much tougher because it is very soft sand, and the paths have been worn very wide. Perhaps this tendency for small tracks to become wide sandy paths is why the map is being so difficult today.
I try not to look too surprised and we are pleased to see some bluebells in the wood across the road.
very well.
The place was fairly rammed and I was a bit worried we would be waiting ours for food but the service was remarkably efficient and the food good (though I would have cooked the asparagus a little more, myself).
anciently laid beech that suggests it was an old drove, and highland cattle in the field to the side.
We have been going steadily uphill for a while. I expect it to drop us into the Devil's Punch Bowl but it doesn't because I am going by memory rather than the contour lines that I cannot see properly without my
glasses. Also having changed from 50,000 scale to 25,000 is messing up my distance estimation. And the memory is wrong because we are on a different footpath!
But it is all good because this route means that we start traversing the side of the Devil's Punch Bowl with
views into and across it to the tree covered slopes the other side of the (hidden) Youth Hostel.
Caramel does better than me but we are both panting by the time it levels off.
Last time I was here the beauty of the place was marred by the roaring of traffic from the A3 as it skirted the
eastern edge of the Punch Bowl. Amazingly it has gone. diverted through a tunnel. We pass the line of what must be the old A3, filled with soil and greening with lots of trees planted.
A little above it we hit the old turnpike which must have been replaced by the A3 and is now after who knows how many years interruption, the road to Portsmouth again. Well, at least a little bit of it for walkers and cyclists.
shown to pedestrians and so much to cars and lorries, and the idea that the tunnel has been built to take the traffic away from the walkers http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-surrey-14298318
and riders around this exceptionally beautiful area is a great one. However, when I check it out it turns out that it was because there was a traffic pinch point at Hindhead.
Oh well, whatever the reason, the effect is absolutely great. And this bit of the walk is outstanding. The rain has stopped, the views across the punch bowl and sometimes far, far beyond it, are fantastic, and the lighter green scar of the old A3 is almost an
enhancement as it reminds me of how much better this is than it would be without the tunnel.
At some point around now, Caramel has to answer the phone again. This time it is a friend with a question about whether or not she should wear pants or not. This is, it seems not a general question about the advisability of knickers but a more specific (and frankly even stranger) query. The friend is doing a cycle ride and has been informed, Caramel tells me, that it is a good idea to smear her more intimate parts with something that is known technically as "minty arse lard," before serious cycling expeditions.
Which all makes perfect sense but, apparently the friend is concerned that the minty arse lard might disappear into her bits without pants. This makes no sort of sense to me because, it seems to me that pants would make no difference to the minty arse lard disappearing into your bits potential problem unless you smeared the minty arse lard over your pants.
Which would just be silly, surely?
However, I neglect to ask Caramel this for fear of looking like a damned lubber (I am re-reading Patrick O'Brian books). Pants advice administered, we continue on our way.
We come to a view with a memorial marking where two men were hung for murdering a sailor.
And shortly afterwards we come to the new National Trust cafe.
extremely expensive cake but very nice (don't worry, Caramel paid).
name).
We decide on balance to take the chance and start out. One advantage of this route is that we continue
around the rim of the Devil's Punch Bowl for a bit longer. Then we take a little road off, past some houses, cross a busy road and find a path down into the Golden Valley.
This is lovely, but also a bit ominous. We have climbed a long way up to the rim of the punch bowl. And the
path goes down and down and down. Not that I mind down at this sort of gradient but I am aware that we will have to go up again. Still for now it is very pleasant walking through trees freshly in leaf.
After a moments thought we opt for right, there is a very small, rough path winding up the hill, we start up and I am soon out of breath but also I realise that this is foolish. Yes there is a clear way if we get up to the top but it we are climbing the wrong side of the valley. We will have to dip down and up again.
way.
It is a hard steep grind up the hill. But the navigation problem is worse. Tiny branching paths through thick woodland. This gets worse once the land levels off (because at least we have the slope to gauge things with). As we get more confused Caramel gets out her compass and we use that for a while.
But something isn't right. I can't quite believe that what her compass tells us is South really is. So I get mine out. They don't agree at all. Caramel tries holding hers out further from her body and it starts to agree with mine. She has been drinking from a Camelbak all day, and, it turns out, that the drinking tube has a http://shop.camelbak.com/store/landing.aspx?categoryid=754
magnetic clip
And, of course, the magnetic clip has sent the compass mental!
So on we go, aware now of the problem. It is still pretty bewildering but then we get a glimpse of a church through the trees. It is over a side valley and we try to find a way round this but in the end give up and go down before climbing up again.
And emerge on a little road with houses, including one called Woodcock Cottage. There is a Woodcock Bottom round here somewhere, I seem to remember, but not marked on this map.
However I am fairly confident (Greyshott is not that big) and we set off down the road in the direction I think
right, and soon enough we do come to the church.
Completely confident of where we are we dive off down a byway, this one with houses on it for the first
stretch.
I get a bit confused as I am still over-compensating for the map scale change but Caramel puts me right. And
we settle into a very pleasant woodland walk for a kilometer or so until we reach the top of string of little artificial ponds.
a sign informs us are thought to be "hammer ponds" reservoirs for driving a water powered forge hammer.
http://www.grayshott.com/wordpress/waggoners-wells/
The track turns into a minor road, and I manage to miss the point where the minor road splits from a byway
which I had intended to take. The minor road comes out on the A3 and there is no crossing place.
I am a bit worried in case we scamper across to an impenetrable barrier but it is (as Caramel points out) a duel carriageway and fortunately there is no barrier in the central reservation, and we get over it easily enough.
We find a slightly muddy track at the side of a house and this takes us down to a minor road.
takes us under the railway before running at the side of it.
This pleasant walking is interrupted by the B2131 this proves to be busier than I expected and the cars are going too fast for comfort. We are glad to get off it for a little bit of byway, that leads to a much quieter minor road.
it is a quiet country road that soon evolves into a quiet suburban one.
Finally there is a stretch of B road up to Liphook station. But this is suburbia now and it has a pavement.


We have to wait a while for the train, but there is a seat and (cold) hot cross buns. And when it does come it
is not crowded so we can trundle back to London in comfort. There are even a few safari people left, presumably coming back after their day out, at Waterloo Station.
That was a great walk. It was lovely to have company for a change. Thursley is a truly unusual environment and the Devil's Punch Bowl is amazing. I can never quite believe that it is in Surrey, it seems too wild and rugged.
Caramel's panorama of the Devil's Punch Bowl.
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What a lovely walk! Will try to get tob he punch bowl, amazing photos.
The cycle was great with lots of minty lard, on the inside of the shorts with no pants (slight private disappearing, but no apparent side effects)
Caramel's lardy-arsed friend x
He he, thanks for the comment. Caramel has pointed out that it was a text conversation rather than a phone call - about whether you should wear pants - she seemed to think that I had not made this sufficiently clear.
Glad the cycle ride was great.